deepcontemplator

thinking deeply about things that matter

Category: Thoughts

  • How to think about art

    It might be tempting to look at analyses of books, movies or any other work of art. This is specially useful as sometimes art can feel so esoteric so you want to understand what the whole noise is about!

    With Internet, there are a range of analysis videos now, which delve from the superficial to deep psychological or creative aspects.

    The existence of these analyses are definitely a blessing. It can sometimes give us a framework, or direction to think about when thinking about art.

    For example, a book analysis can throw light on the motivations of the characters, the sequences and the general message or theme. It is possible to read the entire book and miss the whole point!

    However, any art, according to me is also a personal story. The meaning of which is for you to interpret.

    It can differ from person to person, and with time, the way someone views a piece of art can differ even for the same person.

    While its helpful to rely on experts to understand how to look at art, our goal should be to build that muscle ourselves. Even with a book, it is useful at different points along the story to check with ourselves what we feel the theme or what the author is trying to convey.

    Then we can always look up online as to how other people have different interpretations of the same book.

    But eventually we need to find the meaning which resonates with us the most, based on our journey and experiences.

  • On consuming content

    There is so much content available these days, and pressure associated to keep up with it. You need to be abreast of popular culture, that TV show everyone is talking about, or the social media trend which seems to have become a craze.

    Sometimes lending an ear to the popular culture can be entertaining and be an escape from the monotony or boredom of daily life.

    However it can also turn us into a passive consumer of content. It might make it more difficult for us to listen to our own viewpoints and get in touch with what we believe.

    Or how we think the world works based on our experience.

    There is no harm in consuming content, which can be entertaining and relaxing after a long day at work.

    However it is more important perhaps to make time in the week to exercising your thinking and creativity as well.

    It is important to assimilate and integrate our life experiences and learnings as we go through life.

    To develop your original thought and point of view so that you can look at the world from your unique lens.

  • On hope.

    (v) to want something to happen or be true

    In a world filled with definites, hope can seem like a remnant from the past. Pragmatists may say hope is only wishful thinking.

    But there is always space for hope, and we need to hope even.

    How much ever of a results oriented, task focused, real world person you are, hope has its place. It is a basic human emotion, which even helps to survive tough situations even.

    Hope is the element which keeps us going when we feel we are unable to cope up with the difficulties of life. Even on easier days, hope is a pleasant breeze signaling the possibility of an eternal sunshine.

    Hope helps us build a future narrative of our life in line with our desires and values. With hope, we can see how our life overall makes sense.

    So even as we work in challenging situations and learn and grow, we should not forget to hope. To hope for a better future, for it gives us the courage and energy to keep pursuing on our path.

  • Who are you in competition with?

    Knowingly or unknowingly we can sometimes fall into the trap of competing with others. Maybe when someone casually mentions they travel at least once a month, we take it as our own goal. Or we start following someone’s lifestyle of excessive workouts and try to live up to their definition of a good workout.

    As long as you are conscious about the competitiveness, or about you falling into the FOMO (fear of missing out) trap, its okay. You know what you are getting into! 😉

    Many times it’s so subtle that we lose track of our selves and what we want to do with our lives.

    How we wish to spend our time, energy and money.

    A more fulfilling approach according to me, is to spend the time and effort to understand what really matters to you.

    What your purpose in life is, what your values are and what energizes you.

    You can then do an audit if you are spending your time, energy and money in line with what matters to you, according to you.

    You can see the areas where you are just following someone which is taking away from the things which actually matter to you. And once you have this clarity, you can go out and find your community.

    Finding a bunch of people with the same interests as you can be fun and gives a sense of community, You could also indulge in ‘healthy’ competition sometimes so that all of you get a boost towards your goals.

    So the next time you wish you had some activity or item someone has, take a pause. Think why this thing feels so attractive to you. Maybe its really something you wish for, or maybe its just the way someone is projecting it which makes want to have it as well.

  • What is your definition of enough?

    One of the things to think about in life is how much is enough for you?

    How many friends do you want? How many meaningful friendships you can really maintain? Or how big of a house you need? How many countries do you really want to visit and so on!

    You need to draw the line between hustling for more and being content with what you already have, or achieved. Modern culture wants us to believe we are always ‘incomplete’. We can keep getting better or acquire more things in a never ending quest,

    But at many things in life, being good enough, or even average will just do.

    It might be the best even.

    This is specially important if you have been constantly striving and achieving in one domain of your life. You might have started off on that path as you sorely lacked initially, but then you might lose sight of your rewards and never get to enjoy them.

    In this post The Art and Science of Spending Money, Morgan Housel mentions how, many people get into the mode of making more money and get stuck in it.

    Never having a chance to relax and spend the money, long after they have reached their goals.

    There is ample flex in pushing the goalpost further and further when you reach one.

    But it doesn’t have to be so.

    You don’t have to be a constant work in progress.

    You can be growing, yet valid and complete at the same time.

    So revel in the light when you reach your goals. Pat yourself for how far you have come.

    And maybe if you want, push for an even bigger goal.

    Or realize that its enough, and choose something new altogether.

  • Living life linearly

    Many a times we fall into the trap of living life in a linear fashion. Tying up the outcome of one event to another and building up a long chain of dependency. The ‘If this, then only that’, leads to being stuck in the same place. You find it difficult to move through anything.

    Our life is made up of different domains.

    Self, family, friends, work.

    Even though its one life and we are one being, these domains can be quite independent as well.

    Hence, its important to maintain the boundaries between these different life domains. We need to not let setbacks in one bleed to another.

    You can independently, gently push your agendas in each of these domains.

    A personal setback does not have to mean you skip that important event of your friend. A family argument does not necessarily have to impact your work.

    This is an important skill of – compartmentalization.

    Of course there can be events which are so overwhelming and their impact can cut through all areas of life. It is important to help yourself get through such difficult life events without imposing additional burdens of achievement.

    You don’t need to turn into a cold individual who endlessly pushes through goals as if setbacks and failures don’t impact you.

    Having a sense of compartmentalization and clear separation between different life areas in fact makes life more palatable and ‘livable’.

    On the same lines, you do not have to strictly adhere to a linear life where one thing leads to another. There is no timeline or predestined order of events you need to follow.

    Be aware of the freedom life gives us and be courageous to follow your own life order. You do not have to live by anyone’s definition of life and how its supposed to be lived, linearly.

  • Be generative

    Be generative

    In the current times, it can be so easy to passively live away your life consuming content. There is nothing wrong with this. However to achieve anything worthwhile, you need to assimilate and integrate your learning and lived experience and generate energy, ideas and work from it.

    Being generative and producing work performs many functions –

    You find your voice

    Actually going and doing something consistently helps you discover your voice. Constantly putting yourself out there signals to yourself that you matter and your ideas matter.

    You build the momentum of creation

    By forcing yourself to be generative, you are constantly looking for ideas which you can use and bring to fruition. This builds on itself and creates momentum to sustain and grow further.

    Its a way to teach yourself

    Its always said that the best way to learn something is to teach it to someone. By teaching someone, and in the process generating words, notes, conversations puts into test how much you have understood the topic.

    It might be one thing to abstractly understand algorithms, but actually writing it down and explaining it step by step to someone and convincing them why it works is totally different.

    So go ahead and weave in moments of being generative along with learning and growth.

  • Word of the month – advocate

    Word of the month – advocate

    advocate (v) – to speak in support of an idea or course of action

    The past month I was thinking of how advocating for what you believe in and stand for is so important. It might come naturally for a few of us, and for others it might be tough to build this skill.

    We might find it easier to advocate for someone or rally for a cause someone else starts fighting for. You might find it comfortable to hop on a bus which someone else is already steering.

    However, we get the most scared when it comes to advocating for ourselves.

    And we matter. Our ideas matter.

    At times, it might be us who needs an advocate the most.

    To be able to advocate for oneself, we firstly need to be clear on what matters to us. It takes reflection, questioning and self awareness to understand our own core values and beliefs.

    If you are prone to self doubt and low self esteem, it might be particularly hard to self advocate and drive results in the direction which best suits us.

    The journey of self advocating is bound to have failures, embarrassment and disappointments. Just accepting this can make us more resilient and realistic about the effort involved.

    We need to slowly and compassionately persist.

    Consistently stand up for ourselves and what we believe in, and how we view the world. Having allies and learning from people who are good at advocating for themselves will be helpful.

    In the end, we owe it to ourselves to make us and our ideas be heard and seen in the way we deem fit and right for us.

  • Striving vs living – finding the balance

    Striving vs living – finding the balance

    It can be sometimes be addictive to keep working on ourselves and strive to be a better version. Never living the life which we currently have as a result.

    It is important to be aware of areas where we need work. Where there is room for growth. And we can consistently work on these aspects.

    However, we should not forget to live the life we already have, as we strive to be better.

    It is a delicate balance.

    On the one hand you are fully aware of your challenges and rough edges. On the other, you fully embrace your present self providing yourself validation and compassion.

    In present times, its easy to fall into the trap of constant striving. There are many signals from media, society hammered into us on how we are not smart, beautiful or social enough. Many of them are based on completely false narratives, but its a hard task to avoid this constant humdrum.

    So remember to live your life completely even as you continue on your growth journey. .

  • The limits of to do lists and planners

    The limits of to do lists and planners

    There is the oft quoted
    Failing to plan is planning to fail

    So we end up planning our days by the minute with things to do. There are many apps and planners which help you do this (to the extreme sometimes). You are asked at the start of the year/month/week to meticulously plan ahead, tack your daily habits like water intake, reading, watching shows and all. In return, at least implicitly, the promise is that by becoming an ultimate task slayer, you become a happier person.

    I have had my trysts and multiple false starts with such planning apps and planners. You firstly spend a lot of time trying to find the perfect app or planner which is customized to you. Sad news is – there are none which will perfectly fit you. There are many apps though which can work for you. 

    The important aspect however is how much pay off can you expect from tracking your days as a series of To Dos.

    As with many things in life, we go through seasons and cycles. There might be times when you are in the productivity mode and the whole month is filled with ticking off items on your to do list. Then there are extended periods of slump, where maybe you get 2-3 things done in the entire week. And that is okay.

    We do not have to be chained to never ending to do lists. 

    Our worth is not determined by how long the to do list is or how many items we are able to tick off.

    My experience with planners have been lackluster to say the least. I realized I am better off without them, and a simple to do list for the week, quarter, year suffices and mostly gets the job done.

    However, like any other tool in your life, be open to trying something new. Something which probably can make your life simpler. If it works for you, adopt it, even in a big way maybe!

    But the tool should not become an end in itself. Its a mean to achieve something greater. Definitely there are many worthwhile and important things in life, which you go ahead and do anyway, and may not figure in your to do list!